On Statements of Interest

Tonight I focused on making statements of interest. My goal was to get in four SOIs. Mission accomplished, but at the same time I did not see many results. How I deliver the SOI is crucial.

SOI #1
At the Reef, I walk in to a four set of very attractive women. One of them is a middle school teacher. We have a lot to talk about, since have a career in common. She cannot get over how old she is. I tell her, it's ok, you're sexy and you look young. She cringes. In my opinion, stating interest after a woman disqualifies herself is a mistake. It communicates that I go for women that feel bad about themselves.

SOI #2
Man, it's the teacher geek convention tonight-- I SOI another teacher. But I don't think she heard it. Conversation was too platonic for her to notice, and it probably just rolled right off her. I was in the set too long (half an hour) before I SOIed, and relationship dynamics had already been firmly set into the friends zone. Plus, I don't think my SOI was sincere. I was too focused on getting it in to make the delivery strong.

SOI #3
I ask a girl where Starbucks is on the street, and then immediately tell her that her necklace is sexy. My delivery was weak and insincere, because I honestly didn't think her necklace was that sexy. After I am twenty feet away, I hear laughter behind me. I knew they were laughing at me because I heard the word "NECKLACE!?!?" I never felt so rejected since San Francisco when a set of women wouldn't even open; instead the laughed at me. Harsh rejections like these remind me of the very pain that made me decide to do this.

SOI #4
I ask another girl where Starbucks is, and then tell her her shirt is sexy. "I love the navy blue color, it looks good on you." She thanks me. She could tell it was a genuine compliment. I felt centered. I wasn't going out of my way to be nice, I was just riffing on how I like the color navy blue. The best compliment I gave all night, and I did it not ten seconds after opening her.

Tonight I learned that SOIs must balance between two important criteria:
1.) It MUST be sincere. The content of the compliment is not nearly as important as its sincerity. She has to know I mean it. I think its best to stick to something concrete, like what she's wearing. Abstract things can be noticed too, but only if her reality is paced. "This may sound weird, but I think it's sexy the way you like walks on the beach."
2.) Better sooner than later. Waiting until a sincere compliment comes is fine, but don't let the conversation get too platonic. Usually I can find something sexy about a woman in the first three seconds. Complimenting a woman's style, although visual, communicates that I appreciate women for more than their looks. Women take time to look good, and they deserve apprecation for it. Making an SOI sooner is also good just because it's more efficient. I am stating why I am here, and I can escalate more quickly than if I floundered in platonic discourse.